knowing my limits BBQ

I used to be a person that could do it all...i knew the answer to most questions (if i didnt know i made up something that sounded good). I was there for everyone when they needed me, i as able to listen, give advice and help in anyway needed. I could be a single parent, full time college student, worker, attend all of my kids activities, plan and organize dinners and BBQ's for family and friends-usually 40+ people. I could create thyme partings for the kids-
I always believed that no matter how old they were they were still young enough to enjoy. anyway I think i had to be perfect at everything. Then I tried to BBQ, it looked easy enough,make mountain of charcoal, squirt lighter fluid on them, light, wait for them to be ashy, spread out the coals, add food to grille and close lid, checking and turning food until done. I know what you are thinking-she knows the steps what is the problem? For some unknown reason I could not cook this way. either it burnt on outside-raw on inside, not done and still cooking past bedtime. So then I thought i would get a gas grill. Now i knew that i could BBQ now. Guess what-no go. I was afraid of gas--dont like explosions-and again too hot too low too everything. not willing to give up i tryed a counter top electric grill----WOO HOO IT WORKED. But really this was not true BBQ this was cooking in the house. So at the request of my children not to cook using the BBQ (they didnt like burnt or raw food-imagin that) and accepting that I had to admit that there was something that i could not do...I admitted to everyone I CANT BBQ. now i did not let this stop me from having BBQ's-I just had to assign someone else to do the cooking. :) never admit full defeat.